So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
A+ Viking dick