I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.