My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.