She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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