I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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