that's an acceptable place to lick
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
