I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
