I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I think your dad took our porno
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.