Sry I called you an 8
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
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All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
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My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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