Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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