i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
