we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
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