To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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