How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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