O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
