i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dont lie about slip and slides
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize