David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Randomize
