Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha