I'm really into asian looking animals
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.