She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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