the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
