The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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