the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize