I need help removing her.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
