I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
