You're earring is so big in my mouth
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my gift to your gina
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize