so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
