The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
