Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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