Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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