Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize