hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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