The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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