Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
i dont even know how to be here
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
