If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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