dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Randomize