Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
