So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
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I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
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Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.