I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
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