If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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