How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
