i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.