It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
21 Bartenders That Are Definitely Winning At Their Jobs
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi