we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
