Where are you?
In a non slutty way
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
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I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
cat food counts as protein by the way
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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