Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
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