i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
