So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize