Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
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