just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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