I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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