Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
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he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
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Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?