I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.